Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers in the world! This is a fun video, but just so you know, the women break dancing are NOT really pregnant, just the women watching. I was a little worried when I first watched it wondering how one could be pregnant and break dancing!
Here’s to having fun on our special day!
My brother sent me an email about job titles for moms:
A woman, renewing her driver’s license at the County Clerk ’s office,
Was asked by the woman recorder to state her occupation. She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself.
‘What I mean is, ‘ explained the recorder,
‘do you have a job or are you just a …?’
‘Of course I have a job,’ snapped the woman. ’I'm a Mom.’
‘We don’t list ‘Mom’ as an occupation,
‘housewife’ covers it,’ Said the recorder emphatically.
I forgot all about her story until one day I found myself
In the same situation, this time at our own Town Hall.
The Clerk was obviously a career woman, poised,
Efficient, and possessed of a high sounding title like,
‘Official Interrogator’ or ‘Town Registrar.’
‘What is your occupation?’ she probed.
What made me say it? I do not know.
The words simply popped out.
‘I’m a Research Associate in the field of
Child Development and Human Relations.’
The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in midair and
Looked up as though she had not heard right.
I repeated the title slowly emphasizing the most significant words..
Then I stared with wonder as my pronouncement was written,
In bold, black ink on the official questionnaire.
‘Might I ask,’ said the clerk with new interest,
‘just what you do in your field?’
Coolly, without any trace of fluster in my voice,
I heard myself reply,
‘I have a continuing program of research,
(what mother doesn’t)
In the laboratory and in the field,
(normally I would have said indoors and out).
I’m working for my Masters, (first the Lord and then the whole family)
And already have four credits (all daughters)
Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities,
(any mother care to disagree?)
And I often work 14 hours a day, (24 is more like it).
But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers
And the rewards are more of a satisfaction rather than just money.’
There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk’s voice as she
Completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door.
As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career,
I was greeted by my lab assistants — ages 13, 7, and 3.
Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model,
(a 6 month old baby) in the child development program,
Testing out a new vocal pattern.
I felt I had scored a beat on bureaucracy!
And I had gone on the official records as someone more
Distinguished and indispensable to mankind than ‘just another Mom.’
Motherhood!
What a glorious career!
Especially when there’s a title on the door.
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
Every Thursday I post a quote or thought for all of us to ponder. Today’s quote is from humanitarian, Lynn Twist, pictured on the right with me in Fairfield, Iowa.
“When a tree falls in Brazil, there is less oxygen in Ohio.”
Lynn is the bestselling author of The Soul of Money and co-founder of the Pachamama Alliance. I had the privilege of taking a long walk with Lynn and my visiting friend and New York Times best selling author, Marci Shimoff, on the walking trails along the lake in my hometown of Fairfield, Iowa. Lynn was visiting our town because she was receiving the Mayor Malloy’s humanitarian award. I found Lynn to be the most genuine down-to-earth yet global thinker I’ve ever met.
Lynn has spent more than three decades working in positions of leadership with many global initiaves including: ending world hunger, protecting the woldks rainforests, empowering indigenous peoples, inproving health, economic, and political conditions for women and children, and advancing the scientific understanding of human consciousness.
She has had many teachers in her life. In addition to being trained by Mother Theresa, some of Lynn’s great teachers are the people she meets in third world countries. For instance, she traveled to Ethiopia during the 1984 famine that killed 1 million people. (more…)
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Thoughtful Thursday: Every Thursday I post a quote or thought for all of us to ponder.
“The important thing is this: to be able, at any moment, to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.” – Charles Dubois
I noticed that “Blogher of the Week” Award was given to Tangobaby2 for the article about the young mother and 3 children who were homeless on the streets of San Francisco looking for a safe place to stay, escaping from domestic violence. My questions immediately were, “Where is HER mother, grandmother, extended family? How did she end up so alone? What happened to the city shelters?” Aren’t you confounded that this happens in the United States? I am.
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I love it when science discovers what we already intuitively know. Women are different than men! In this particular study, explained in an article by Ellen Michaud in Prevention Magazine and reprinted on Learning Place Online, it was found that women do not have the usual fight or flight response to stress. It’s not a surprise to me that they instead meet together to bond and communicate. (more…)
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Continuing with the subject from my last entry about women’s rights in the US and Iran…
There is a matriarchal society on a paradise island in the Arabian Sea off the Malabar Coast of southern India, called Lakshadweep. Women enjoy a lofty status on these islands. Property is passed from the mother to daughter and men can only be caretakers. Husbands are supposed to give a salary to their wives on a yearly basis, and if they fail to do that, the women can and do ask for divorces. I find it interesting that the islanders are Muslim, but the women are honored and in charge. Their manner of dress is simple and similar to the Muslims of Malabar coast.
I’d just be curious to visit a matriarchial society, even though it’s a very long and arduous journey to reach these 36 teeny islands off the coast of Kerala, India. The water is clear blue and the beaches sandy.
If you know of other matriarchial groups, send me a comment
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Obama signed the Fair Pay Bill on January 29. I don’t know why, but I’m always surprised when I hear about women’s rights still being an issue, especially in the United States. Of course, I personally feel lucky to have been born here because we have more rights and opportunities than in most other countries. However, I’m grateful for women like Lilly Ledbetter, who fought for her rights, that will benefit our daughters and granddaughters because Lilly actually won’t benefit from the Fair Pay Legislation. Her story is that she worked for Goodyear Tire for 19 years before she found out that she was getting paid less than her male co-workers who had similar experience and education in the same job. (more…)
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I just attended a Ladies Who Launch Event in Boulder at Common Threads with my daughter (@gracekboyle)whom I’m visiting this week. As a lone entrepreneur, I long for the opportunity to connect and network with other women in business and creative projects. I think it’s crucial. I do meet on the phone with a mastermind group of women from around the country, and I am so grateful for their support and inspiration.
The Ladies Who Launch group is so fantastic because you connect in person with a community of like-minded women who help give more exposure to their products or services, through marketing and distribution opportunities.
This group is about women helping women. At this event, there were four dynamic women who presented their expertise about marketing, branding and social media. (more…)
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I’m writing this entry from an old stone house on the grounds of a Trappistine Monastery. I am living with four other women writers (not the nuns) on a six day writing retreat lead by Rae Bird. Our days are filled with hours of writing and hiking on the 500 acres of exquisite rolling hillsides surrounded by cows and silence. I learned today that bulls are territorial of their cows, so don’t walk too close! He snorted and gave me a warning charge–enough to stop my heart and give me something exciting to write about.
In the evenings, we meet to read our entries to each other for feedback. It sounds so simple yet much needed by women.
I know a writing retreat may not be possible for everyone, but I think more happiness and clarity can be created by writing about our hopes and dreams, our doubts and fears. Writing or journaling can be like moving the 800 pound gorilla off our chest. Sometimes we just have things to say, but either no one is there to listen, or we don’t want anyone else to know what we’re thinking and feeling. In that way, writing is cathartic, but it can also be a means of collecting our family history.
I’m suggesting that each day be a mini-retreat when we begin writing our thoughts and memories, not necessarily for publication but just so that our unique history & stories are made permanent. Write about how you feel, who you’ve loved (and hated), your thoughts on politics, traveling, foods you love, children you raised or didn’t raise, how you spend your days.
Writing To Do List:
1.) Write every day, even for 5-10 minutes for a start. Set a timer, don’t stop writing no matter what, and don’t edit. Just listen to the voice inside and write.
2.) Create a memoir folder on your computer or in spiral notebooks as you collect your family history pieces.
3.) Form a writing group. Write and then read to each other.
4.) Read books that help you tell your soul’s story: I recommend Writing Down the Bones (about free writing) and Old Friend From Far Away (about writing memoir) by Natalie Goldberg. Writing from Life by Susan W. Albert will also give you a jumpstart in telling your stories.
5.) Read blogs about writing well, such as Write to Done
I’d love to hear any ideas that have helped you write.
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
In my recent presentation at a women’s conference, I emphasized how cultural beliefs affect women on such a deep level, that they can be insidious. Often, we don’t even know that we are participating in that limitation or conditioning. It’s similar to the barracuda that was placed in a fish tank with smaller fish. He could’ve had a great meal, except that the scientists conducting the experiment had placed a clear divider in the tank to separate the barracuda from his enemies. After hitting his head on the clear divider over time, the scientists removed it. Guess what! Right, the barracuda repeatedly swam to the same spot , and would not go past where the barrier ‘used to be’. He was conditioned in the same way many of us are, often unknowingly.
In light of what I was teaching, I was thrilled to hear one of the main keynote speakers share how limiting beliefs about women in academia affected her in the 1970’s (and how she overcame them). Sally Mason is the new president at the University of Iowa. When she began her higher education, she had wanted to become a field biologist, but her male advisor said women can only be in the laboratory, not in the field, so that’s what she did. When she decided at one point that she would get her masters degree in biology, similar advise was given. Women don’t finish getting their masters degrees. Now, I know that perhaps there was some truth to that, HOWEVER, does that mean that NO woman should pursue advanced degrees, even if it hadn’t been done much before– like the barracuda? We’ve come a long way from the limiting beliefs about the capabilities of women but there is more road to cover. We can start with our own personal journey. The number of female college presidents has more than doubled since the mid-1980s. 24 percent of all newly hired presidents were women, but many are presidents of 2-year colleges.
Have you broken through the conditioned barriers in your mind? Are there any thoughts you are believing such as “I won’t be successful because it hasn’t happened yet?”
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As a woman who owns her own business, I am constantly in support of organizations and businesses for such a cause. One powerful organization is: The Women Business Owners Network (WBON), a Vermont-based association of over 320 women business owners. WBON is the largest non-profit women business owner membership organization in Northern New England. They work on bringing together business owners and organizations that support women in business while also creating a forum for women to connect, share and grow their business.
I recently found their new blog which helps to create opportunities for members to exchange information and resources through regional Chapter meetings, conferences, and tradeshows. I believe women thrive when we connect with each other, and provide each other with inspiration and the power to keep growing.
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
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