Each Thursday I’ll share a favorite quote or thought. Have one you’d like to share? Please do so in the comment section. Author Dr. Christiane Northrup has said: “The state of a woman’s health is indeed completely tied up with the culture in which she lives and her position within it, as well as the way she lives her life as an individual…healing cannot occur for women until we have critically examined and changed some of the beliefs and assumptions that we all unconsciously inherit and internalize in our culture.”
We get conditioned just like the kittens in the Nobel Prize-winning experiment who were raised by scientists in an environment that contained only horizontal lines on the walls of their cages and in the rooms where they were kept.
Once they grew into mature cats, they were placed in a normal environment and proceeded to run into anything with vertical lines. The cats literally didn’t “SEE” anything vertical. Many of us also cannot “see” options or choices outside of our past conditioning either, UNTIL WE CONSCIOUSLY CHOOSE to change the patterns.
Question the validity of our conditioning. What thoughts do you have that limit you?
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I just returned from two days at the Beyond Rubies 30th annual Women’s Conference in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. It’s a conference for women of all generations and backgrounds to learn practical ideas on how to succeed. Each participant has the chance to network and attend 4 keynote speeches plus 6 of the 100 workshops. I presented one of the breakout sessions with my workshop called Beyond Belief.
5 Main Points Learned at the conference to improve our happiness and success.
1.) Start your day with humor (that’s why women are wearing the red noses in the photo). Keynote speaker, Jim Jewlinski, entertained us and gave us all noses, so we could be silly and laugh when we looked at each other. A day started with increased endorphins is a day set on the right course. (No, we didn’t wear them all day, only for a minute or two).
2.) Each day ask, “What can I do to be on purpose today?”
3.) Start your day with music and dancing.
4.) Insure networking readiness: Always have business cards with you. Keep cards in your glove box, and add business cards to the pockets of your clothes in your closet, so you have them when you go out.
5.) Improve communication: Ask: Is this what you mean? Are you saying? What do you mean?
How do you start your day off on the right foot? How do you network?
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Beliefs are perceptions of reality, a conclusion we’ve come to, or perhaps something we were told we had no reason to doubt at the time. However, unexamined beliefs tend to smolder like wet leaves on fire. But once we explore the belief, its seed and root cause can dissolve. The result is a feeling of lightness and peace. If something seems off or we feel ‘unhappy’, then we might be operating from thought patterns that stifle us which I call limting beliefs. Or, we may not feel ‘off’, but ‘our old way of life’ is being marginalized in some way. We have a choice. Do we resist the change or open our minds and hearts to look at the new possibilities? We don’t have to agree, and we don’t have to change, but are we willing to take a look?
I love tradition and having routines, but I don’t ever want to feel stuck or immovable. In fact, historical research often shows that traditions and immutable values, in fact, change more over time than most adherents recognize. I was just patting myself on the back because I’ve had my website for 5 years now, and felt really connected. Then realized I was behind the times when my daughter, Grace, social media extraordinaire, pushed me onto the new communication scene, and I am now twittering, maintaining two blogs, and reaching out on facebook and linkedin.
Just this morning, Saturday, Feb. 28. I heard Daniel Schorr on Scott Simon’s show on NPR. He’s a veteran journalist (92 years old) and he’s just started a twitter account! He said that what’s lost is the editing and discipline of writing a news article. But what is gained is that every person is his own reporter sending his or her own news. It’s not right or wrong, but just different.
What beliefs do you want to explore, examine, dissolve? Leave a comment here or on twitter!
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I love this video of friendship between two unlikely animals–a dog and elephant who truly are devoted to each other. What trust the dog, Bella, must have to allow a 14,000 pound ( that’s 7 tons!) elephant pet her belly.
Some people find it difficult to stay open to the differences that surround us every day, because our perceptions or beliefs become ingrained in the fibers of our mind and muscles. This begins a process that almost cements itself into our brains.
As President Obama expressed in his inaugural speech, “we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.”
Perhaps a dog and elephant becoming friends is easier than enemies reaching out to understand each other. Let’s begin the journey by dissolving the limiting beliefs and notions that may be lodged in our own souls, and reach out to those around us who think differently than we do. I know there are those who think that President Obama is not anchored in reality, but just spouting rhetoric making up hope for the impossible. That can be a limiting belief that allows no room for other options. A belief in failure attracts that. Beliefs don’t work alone, but it’s the action that’s based on the beliefs that yield the results.
To hear more of the inaugural speech listen to NPR. http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=99590481
Do your limiting beliefs blind you from seeing all the options and possibilities for success and love? We all have the capability of dissolving those notions that block our dreams from manifesting.
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Photo from REUTERS
Today, January 20, I am sitting with many of my dearest friends with whom I’ve shared countless events over the last 30 years while living in Iowa.
This is one of the most inspiring events I’ve experienced in my life. Even the news reporters were looking for adjectives to describe the experiences.Today is the day that the world can come together as one to celebrate, in spite of our political persuasions before we face our many challenges to recover from financial crisis. For reviews of the inaugural day’s events see CNN and Huffington Post Blog. (more…)
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Beliefs sure do affect all of us in every aspect of our lives. Judgements made or insinuated are insidious. America is supposed to be a melting pot. After all, our forefathers came to America with the intention of practicing religious freedom. I am always amazed that so many Americans are still prejudiced. Why are they? I think because of fear. Fear of change. Fear of losing control. When we have a vice-presidential candidate, Sarah Palin, speaking to a crowd, and allowing them to shout out about Senator Obama, “kill him” “, “off with his head”, and then NOT speak up. WE each must stand up and stop this. She is not necessarily responsible for what they might say, but she is responsible to stop cries of hate. In my opinion, she is stoking anger and division. Each of us has a responsibility to create more acceptance of differences. HOW? Voting will be one way to speak our minds. Are you registered? Vote for what you stand for, without tearing down the other candidates. It is a practice to choose what we want, not focus on hate.
David Gergen of Harvard University’s Kennedy School of Government, CNN commentator, and in my opinion a deep-thinking fair man, who has been a presidential advisor to Republicans and Democrats, from Richard Nixon to the present, has expressed his concern. He recently said “there is this free-floating sort of whipping around anger that could lead to some violence.”
In this global financial crisis, our focus must be on what we want, not on what we fear. Our beliefs blind us and sometimes make us do crazy things. When Barack Obama spoke in Ohio yesterday, he encouraged the crowd to reject panic and division, and instead focus on resolve and steady leadership. Of course, I know all the candidates are criticizing each other, but there is a line that Palin has crossed, in allowing hate threats. I want to acknowledge John McCain for defending Obama, one time, when a woman said Barack was an Arab and she did not trust him. McCain said “No, he’s a decent family man and citizen.” But that raises the question, does McCain believe all Arabs are not decent?
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Books such as Think and Grow Rich and As A Man Thinketh have been around for many years. By reading these books and others, many of us have learned that our thoughts have powerful affects on us. Thoughts will always flow through our minds, but we don’t have to believe everything we think. We can choose the ones to believe. This isn’t ‘new age jargon’. In Dr. Norman Doidge’s new book, The Brain That Changes Itself, you will find how he bridges the gap between science and self-help in his varied case studies of brain plasticity. Dr. Doidge was also featured on PBS’s The Brain Fitness Program. (more…)
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The fisherman in Lake Tanganyika have a unique way of fishing. They throw a net between two fishing boats. The shadow casts over the water makes the fish ‘believe’ they are caught in a net. The fish behave accordingly and just stay within the confines of the shadow net. The fishermen then get their hand held nets and scoop up their dinner.
Check to see if you are caught in the proverbial net of deceipt. Things are not always what they appear to be, but if we are stuck in one perception of reality, we cannot see any outs. Stop for a moment, and ask, “Is this true?” “How do I know it’s true?”
This photo is not from Lake Tanganyika, but in the Gulf of Mexico where my nephew is throwing his net to catch bait.
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In my recent presentation at a women’s conference, I emphasized how cultural beliefs affect women on such a deep level, that they can be insidious. Often, we don’t even know that we are participating in that limitation or conditioning. It’s similar to the barracuda that was placed in a fish tank with smaller fish. He could’ve had a great meal, except that the scientists conducting the experiment had placed a clear divider in the tank to separate the barracuda from his enemies. After hitting his head on the clear divider over time, the scientists removed it. Guess what! Right, the barracuda repeatedly swam to the same spot , and would not go past where the barrier ‘used to be’. He was conditioned in the same way many of us are, often unknowingly.
In light of what I was teaching, I was thrilled to hear one of the main keynote speakers share how limiting beliefs about women in academia affected her in the 1970′s (and how she overcame them). Sally Mason is the new president at the University of Iowa. When she began her higher education, she had wanted to become a field biologist, but her male advisor said women can only be in the laboratory, not in the field, so that’s what she did. When she decided at one point that she would get her masters degree in biology, similar advise was given. Women don’t finish getting their masters degrees. Now, I know that perhaps there was some truth to that, HOWEVER, does that mean that NO woman should pursue advanced degrees, even if it hadn’t been done much before– like the barracuda? We’ve come a long way from the limiting beliefs about the capabilities of women but there is more road to cover. We can start with our own personal journey. The number of female college presidents has more than doubled since the mid-1980s. 24 percent of all newly hired presidents were women, but many are presidents of 2-year colleges.
Have you broken through the conditioned barriers in your mind? Are there any thoughts you are believing such as “I won’t be successful because it hasn’t happened yet?”
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We can change how we experience life by changing our beliefs, not just because we’re changing our thoughts, but because we are actually altering our brain chemistry, and using a different part of our brain. Even our spiritual lives can be enhanced when our brains function in a different manner.
For a phenomenal look at the power of our brains, I’d like to share a cosmic presentation by brain researcher, Jill Bolte Taylor, who documented her experiences when she was having a stroke. This beautiful presentation is entitled, “The Stroke of Insight.”
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
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