Let’s start our days out like four year old Jessica and stand on your sinks, in front of the mirror, and give ourselves a pep talk. We can all do a little self life coaching to lift us over the rough spots in our days.
Gotta love this kid!
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Letting Go . . Again
Some years ago, I accompanied my husband on a business trip to The Cayman Islands, which are known for some of the best snorkeling in the world. He decided to teach me to snorkel by having me jump from a low wall into rough water wearing my snorkel gear. I began thrashing and almost drowned the two of us. We made it out of the water alive, and then noticed a group of beginner snorkelers swimming in a barrier reef that looked like a shallow pool.
That’s where I finally learned to breathe through that ridiculously narrow tube. I don’t do well when I am thrown in over my head. I like to wade in with my feet touching the bottom, if needed, at least at first. This makes it easier for me to let go of my fears.
Once I got the hang of it, my husband would wake up in the mornings, startled to see me standing beside his side of the bed with my snorkel gear ready to go. I had surrendered to the ocean.
That’s what I felt like when I was thrown into India last week. I again traveled with my husband for this adventure. This time for ayurvedic health purification treatments.
Even though this was my fourth trip to India, the accommodations were more third world than I expected. My room was without windows and had a broken air conditioner with no one available to fix it. The electricity went out every day at noon for a couple hours without any regard for the 100+ degree temperatures. And did I mention the roaches in my room, including one climbing out of my toothbrush?
I know it sounds strange to many people that I would even go to India for rejuvenation treatments,but it is the home of an ancient health treatment called panchakarma.
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In the same breath, I might add that India is not for wimps, but it is a great place to burn off karma, stretch your boundaries and let go of limiting beliefs. In my clearer moments, I watched preconceived perceptions wash down the drain.
It’s a country of opposites — beggars, poverty, deeply spiritual citizens and holy people in the Himalayan mountains are quite common.
The scene outsidewas interesting — an empty lot filled with trash, that was burned on a daily basis, filling the air with choking smoke. Right next to the lot, was a small country club with a beautiful swimming pool filled with water, but no swimmers. Indian chants were blasting over a loudspeaker in the lovely park on the other side of the trash lot. The clinic is in a nice neighborhood, so there were no beggars on the streets, nor smoke from cow dung burning at night.
Their standards of cleanliness, however, are different than mine. I won’t even go into detail. Each day I would let go of my notions of what I needed to feel comfortable.
In each moment I had to die to my beliefs of cleanliness, of fine customer service, of being in control of my environment.
India was a gift that gave me practice allowing the death of my ego, the surrender of how things SHOULD be. The little deaths we go through when we fail, or find ourselves in deep water outside our comfort zone, create a more open-hearted, compassionate, enriching life.
For me, I find that coming up for air to find solid familiar space under my feet every once in awhile, supports the practice of letting go.
LETTING GO is a fast track to experiencing strength, growth and freedom. When we choose to try something different, we learn to stay flexible.
Grab change by the hand, maybe get a lifejacket, and swim.
What is your ‘India’? How have you learned to let go? I’d love to hear from you.
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Their purpose is for all of us to create a more caring nation, just through the simple act of listening.
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Every Thursday I post a quote or thought for all of us to ponder.
I am a life coach who asks questions to individuals who come to me with questions. Each of us has the answers within ourselves and we are our own best expert, but we don’t always realize it. Have you ever found yourself asking others for advice, and then you sift through it, and decide whether or not to act on their ‘brilliant’ advice? Often, it’s just our doubts and fears that block our clarity and creativity. Those doubts and fears can be questioned. (more…)
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Each Thursday I’ll share a favorite quote or thought. Have one you’d like to share? Please do so in the comment section. Author Dr. Christiane Northrup has said: “The state of a woman’s health is indeed completely tied up with the culture in which she lives and her position within it, as well as the way she lives her life as an individual…healing cannot occur for women until we have critically examined and changed some of the beliefs and assumptions that we all unconsciously inherit and internalize in our culture.”
We get conditioned just like the kittens in the Nobel Prize-winning experiment who were raised by scientists in an environment that contained only horizontal lines on the walls of their cages and in the rooms where they were kept.
Once they grew into mature cats, they were placed in a normal environment and proceeded to run into anything with vertical lines. The cats literally didn’t “SEE” anything vertical. Many of us also cannot “see” options or choices outside of our past conditioning either, UNTIL WE CONSCIOUSLY CHOOSE to change the patterns.
Question the validity of our conditioning. What thoughts do you have that limit you?
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I just returned from two days at the Beyond Rubies 30th annual Women’s Conference in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. It’s a conference for women of all generations and backgrounds to learn practical ideas on how to succeed. Each participant has the chance to network and attend 4 keynote speeches plus 6 of the 100 workshops. I presented one of the breakout sessions with my workshop called Beyond Belief.
5 Main Points Learned at the conference to improve our happiness and success.
1.) Start your day with humor (that’s why women are wearing the red noses in the photo). Keynote speaker, Jim Jewlinski, entertained us and gave us all noses, so we could be silly and laugh when we looked at each other. A day started with increased endorphins is a day set on the right course. (No, we didn’t wear them all day, only for a minute or two).
2.) Each day ask, “What can I do to be on purpose today?”
3.) Start your day with music and dancing.
4.) Insure networking readiness: Always have business cards with you. Keep cards in your glove box, and add business cards to the pockets of your clothes in your closet, so you have them when you go out.
5.) Improve communication: Ask: Is this what you mean? Are you saying? What do you mean?
How do you start your day off on the right foot? How do you network?
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Beliefs are perceptions of reality, a conclusion we’ve come to, or perhaps something we were told we had no reason to doubt at the time. However, unexamined beliefs tend to smolder like wet leaves on fire. But once we explore the belief, its seed and root cause can dissolve. The result is a feeling of lightness and peace. If something seems off or we feel ‘unhappy’, then we might be operating from thought patterns that stifle us which I call limting beliefs. Or, we may not feel ‘off’, but ‘our old way of life’ is being marginalized in some way. We have a choice. Do we resist the change or open our minds and hearts to look at the new possibilities? We don’t have to agree, and we don’t have to change, but are we willing to take a look?
I love tradition and having routines, but I don’t ever want to feel stuck or immovable. In fact, historical research often shows that traditions and immutable values, in fact, change more over time than most adherents recognize. I was just patting myself on the back because I’ve had my website for 5 years now, and felt really connected. Then realized I was behind the times when my daughter, Grace, social media extraordinaire, pushed me onto the new communication scene, and I am now twittering, maintaining two blogs, and reaching out on facebook and linkedin.
Just this morning, Saturday, Feb. 28. I heard Daniel Schorr on Scott Simon’s show on NPR. He’s a veteran journalist (92 years old) and he’s just started a twitter account! He said that what’s lost is the editing and discipline of writing a news article. But what is gained is that every person is his own reporter sending his or her own news. It’s not right or wrong, but just different.
What beliefs do you want to explore, examine, dissolve? Leave a comment here or on twitter!
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I love this video of friendship between two unlikely animals–a dog and elephant who truly are devoted to each other. What trust the dog, Bella, must have to allow a 14,000 pound ( that’s 7 tons!) elephant pet her belly.
Some people find it difficult to stay open to the differences that surround us every day, because our perceptions or beliefs become ingrained in the fibers of our mind and muscles. This begins a process that almost cements itself into our brains.
As President Obama expressed in his inaugural speech, “we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.”
Perhaps a dog and elephant becoming friends is easier than enemies reaching out to understand each other. Let’s begin the journey by dissolving the limiting beliefs and notions that may be lodged in our own souls, and reach out to those around us who think differently than we do. I know there are those who think that President Obama is not anchored in reality, but just spouting rhetoric making up hope for the impossible. That can be a limiting belief that allows no room for other options. A belief in failure attracts that. Beliefs don’t work alone, but it’s the action that’s based on the beliefs that yield the results.
To hear more of the inaugural speech listen to NPR. http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=99590481
Do your limiting beliefs blind you from seeing all the options and possibilities for success and love? We all have the capability of dissolving those notions that block our dreams from manifesting.
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Photo from REUTERS
Today, January 20, I am sitting with many of my dearest friends with whom I’ve shared countless events over the last 30 years while living in Iowa.
This is one of the most inspiring events I’ve experienced in my life. Even the news reporters were looking for adjectives to describe the experiences.Today is the day that the world can come together as one to celebrate, in spite of our political persuasions before we face our many challenges to recover from financial crisis. For reviews of the inaugural day’s events see CNN and Huffington Post Blog. (more…)
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Beliefs sure do affect all of us in every aspect of our lives. Judgements made or insinuated are insidious. America is supposed to be a melting pot. After all, our forefathers came to America with the intention of practicing religious freedom. I am always amazed that so many Americans are still prejudiced. Why are they? I think because of fear. Fear of change. Fear of losing control. When we have a vice-presidential candidate, Sarah Palin, speaking to a crowd, and allowing them to shout out about Senator Obama, “kill him” “, “off with his head”, and then NOT speak up. WE each must stand up and stop this. She is not necessarily responsible for what they might say, but she is responsible to stop cries of hate. In my opinion, she is stoking anger and division. Each of us has a responsibility to create more acceptance of differences. HOW? Voting will be one way to speak our minds. Are you registered? Vote for what you stand for, without tearing down the other candidates. It is a practice to choose what we want, not focus on hate.
David Gergen of Harvard University’s Kennedy School of Government, CNN commentator, and in my opinion a deep-thinking fair man, who has been a presidential advisor to Republicans and Democrats, from Richard Nixon to the present, has expressed his concern. He recently said “there is this free-floating sort of whipping around anger that could lead to some violence.”
In this global financial crisis, our focus must be on what we want, not on what we fear. Our beliefs blind us and sometimes make us do crazy things. When Barack Obama spoke in Ohio yesterday, he encouraged the crowd to reject panic and division, and instead focus on resolve and steady leadership. Of course, I know all the candidates are criticizing each other, but there is a line that Palin has crossed, in allowing hate threats. I want to acknowledge John McCain for defending Obama, one time, when a woman said Barack was an Arab and she did not trust him. McCain said “No, he’s a decent family man and citizen.” But that raises the question, does McCain believe all Arabs are not decent?
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