“I gave up addictive foods, and the shadows started to wail.”
The shadows, I call limiting beliefs, your ego, or stress. They act like they are friends who resent that you are asking them to leave.
They exist to help you stay safe in your cocoon life, away from the saber tooth tigers, but I’d say those belief guys and girls just want to be in control of you, similar to the movie, The Adjustment Bureau. It was a simple movie but I thought fascinating that some bureau controlled humanity, and made adjustments to people’s minds, so they could see things more according to the BIG PLAN from the BIG GUY. Not god but the main agent, whoever that was. I say it was a metaphor for the ego, or the old belief.
| ‘The Adjustment Bureau’ Trailer |
According to the Adjustment Bureau, if anyone veered off plan, they had to be ‘adjusted’. They said that humans could not have choices because humanity has screwed up so much when they had free will, such as creating World War I and WWII, that we couldn’t be trusted.
What the movie allows us to see is the importance of choosing our lives. I say, “Let the shadows wail their tonsils out!” We have been strangled by their scrawny, dirty hands for a long time.
I invite myself, and anyone who will listen, to gently yet firmly take each finger from around your neck, and pry them away. You can breathe so much better. Your laughter takes on a new lilt. Why wouldn’t it, free of unwelcomed strangled hands. Find your OWN voice.
We can be our own Adjustment Bureau. The shadow will stop wailing, the crying will stop, the sobbing turning to silent stares.
We may just have to write a new diary of our lives, a different story line with fresh characters, those that we interviewed and chose to be on our life’s pages. They have served their time, and now death to the shadow friends! Be off with thee,arrivederci, ciao, get lost, take a hike, a presto, good riddance!
Ask yourself: “How would my life be different if I did not listen to the shadows?” ” Would I find MY voice?”
Be your own adjustment bureau. You choose. You find YOUR Truth.
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
The Pulse of Commitment
Commitment is tangible, like the beat of your heart felt in your pulse. Have you ever had the experience of being so committed to a goal that no matter how many roadblocks you encountered, you would not give up? How do you know when to continue in the same vein or take another path? Are the roadblocks a sign that you should quit?
I can’t answer that for anyone else, but I’d advise you if you want to re-examine your commitment, to do 3 things first: First, be quiet for awhile, secondly, ask yourself questions, and lastly, listen for your answer deep in your soul.
I do know that once I was committed to applying for Italian citizenship for me and my children, I jumped through all the hoops. More than four years ago, I requested information from the U.S. Bureau of Citizenship and Immigration Services. It was two years before they even looked at my request. I was told that, every day, they get 96,000 requests.
In order for me to apply for Italian citizenship, I had to prove that my paternal grandfather was still an Italian citizen when my father was born in the United States. If he had denounced his Italian citizenship, then I could not apply.
These last four years have been an emotional roller coaster while I was researching, waiting, gathering documents, having them translated into Italian, getting gold apostilles on each document from State agencies, and waiting some more. I wanted to quit so many times.
Twelve months ago, after driving five hours to the Italian Consulate in the US, to apply, I hit another major roadblock. (more…)
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
My hiatus from writing on this blog was only due to the fact that I was IN THE HAPPINESS ZONE IN ITALY FOR A MONTH. You can read more about me fulfilling my dream in my Italy Retreat Blog.
Lenora’s Three Ways to Handle Disappointments and Expectations
1.) Look at the things you like. For Italy, I romanticize its values as though it’s a utopia. I don’t complain about the government, nor the high unemployment, or how many people make up answers, or their relaxed work ethic. It’s hard to get anything done there. Because their primary goal is to enjoy life, this makes it difficult to get things done in a hurry.
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
Thoughtful Thursday: Every Thursday I post a quote or thought for all of us to ponder.
Worry is a state of mind based on fear –Napoleon Hill
3 Steps to Take to Be Worry Free:
1.) Just do the highest action possible. I’ve inherited the worry gene from one of my Italian grandmothers. But just because we’re born with a tendency doesn’t mean we have to keep it. I’ve spent my adult life changing that genetic code by changing my thoughts/beliefs. The shift in beliefs in turn change my DNA or happiness set point. I try to follow the advise from my friend, Jonas who says. “If anything bad is going to happen, it’s going to happen without me aiding and abetting it with my attention.”
2.) Stay in the moment. Don’t try to control every little thing and everything a person says or does. Try planning less. Create more flexibility in our lives when we allow more spontaneity to find a place.
3.) Co-operate with the inevitable. Accept more. As Dale Carnegie said, “If you know a circumstance is beyond your power to change or revise, say to yourself: ‘It is so; it cannot be otherwise.’
Put a ‘stop-less’ order on your worries. Decide just how much anxiety a thing may be worth–and refuse to give it anymore.”
It takes small shifts. Do you have steps to share that help you to be worry free?
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
“When a person’s desire outweighs his fear, success becomes inevitable” ~Unknown
Every Thursday is Thoughtful Thursday when I post a quote or thought for all of us to ponder.
10 Ways to Handle Fear:
1.) Create clarity by questioning your limiting beliefs and the fear. A limiting belief is based on fear not truth. Understanding and clarifying the fear is helpful. The ‘snake’ you see may really be a rope. (more…)
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
They say that the fear of speaking in public is greater than the fear of death.
It usually turns out that many of us fear what others will say about us. We are afraid to look stupid, mess up, lose our train of thought or God forbid, appear to be boring. When we are nervous, it’s usually because we are worried about ourselves. However, the minute it stops being about “you” and starts being about the content and the audience, the better you’ll feel.
Join a group like Toastmasters International which has been around since 1924 and consists of 11,700 clubs in 92 countries around the world. I am a member of Golden Speakers Toastmasters Club that is one of the 95 clubs in District 19 of Iowa. I enjoy being a member because it’s inexpensive, offers a proven and enjoyable way to practice and hone my communication and leadership skills, while speaking to an encouraging audience.
A few months ago, one of our club members, Ed Hipp, won the Toastmasters State Humorous Speech Contest which means he won first place out of 95 clubs in our district (entering speech contests is not a requirement). Last month, he presented his winning speech to a packed house that included our club members and outside guests. I was his evaluator. The beauty of Toastmasters is that we not only practice speaking from specific speech manuals with different purposes, but we evaluate each other’s speeches. It’s all done in an encouraging manner, commenting on the strong points and giving a few suggestions for improvement.
This is a youtube video of my evaluation. You may want to watch Ed’s speech first by clicking the Humorous Speech link above.
Are you ready to tame the fear of public speaking?! You can, you know. Anyone share how they deal with fear of speaking in public?
photo: Toastmasters International
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
I love it when science discovers what we already intuitively know. Women are different than men! In this particular study, explained in an article by Ellen Michaud in Prevention Magazine and reprinted on Learning Place Online, it was found that women do not have the usual fight or flight response to stress. It’s not a surprise to me that they instead meet together to bond and communicate. (more…)
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
Beliefs sure do affect all of us in every aspect of our lives. Judgements made or insinuated are insidious. America is supposed to be a melting pot. After all, our forefathers came to America with the intention of practicing religious freedom. I am always amazed that so many Americans are still prejudiced. Why are they? I think because of fear. Fear of change. Fear of losing control. When we have a vice-presidential candidate, Sarah Palin, speaking to a crowd, and allowing them to shout out about Senator Obama, “kill him” “, “off with his head”, and then NOT speak up. WE each must stand up and stop this. She is not necessarily responsible for what they might say, but she is responsible to stop cries of hate. In my opinion, she is stoking anger and division. Each of us has a responsibility to create more acceptance of differences. HOW? Voting will be one way to speak our minds. Are you registered? Vote for what you stand for, without tearing down the other candidates. It is a practice to choose what we want, not focus on hate.
David Gergen of Harvard University’s Kennedy School of Government, CNN commentator, and in my opinion a deep-thinking fair man, who has been a presidential advisor to Republicans and Democrats, from Richard Nixon to the present, has expressed his concern. He recently said “there is this free-floating sort of whipping around anger that could lead to some violence.”
In this global financial crisis, our focus must be on what we want, not on what we fear. Our beliefs blind us and sometimes make us do crazy things. When Barack Obama spoke in Ohio yesterday, he encouraged the crowd to reject panic and division, and instead focus on resolve and steady leadership. Of course, I know all the candidates are criticizing each other, but there is a line that Palin has crossed, in allowing hate threats. I want to acknowledge John McCain for defending Obama, one time, when a woman said Barack was an Arab and she did not trust him. McCain said “No, he’s a decent family man and citizen.” But that raises the question, does McCain believe all Arabs are not decent?
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
Books such as Think and Grow Rich and As A Man Thinketh have been around for many years. By reading these books and others, many of us have learned that our thoughts have powerful affects on us. Thoughts will always flow through our minds, but we don’t have to believe everything we think. We can choose the ones to believe. This isn’t ‘new age jargon’. In Dr. Norman Doidge’s new book, The Brain That Changes Itself, you will find how he bridges the gap between science and self-help in his varied case studies of brain plasticity. Dr. Doidge was also featured on PBS’s The Brain Fitness Program. (more…)
Lenora's Italy Retreat blog | Lenora's Change Limiting Beliefs Website
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